Having two older brothers is definitely an experience. In a hypothetical future memoir, I could write chapters about being kept awake by late-night gaming and being shadow-boxed at dinner. My brothers have eaten my snacks (and I, theirs, of course) and have made me watch a million different war movies (most of which star Brad Pitt, for some reason). But I wouldn’t trade them for the world, and not just because they used to be my ride to school.
This is the first year that both of them are at college, one a sophomore and one a freshman. I remember being little and desperate for them to go to college. It felt like retribution for years of being the baby that I would get two whole years of being an only child, minus a few months for school breaks. At long last, first dibs on the TV and my own bathroom!
And of course, brushing my teeth alone is a glorious experience after years of fighting over sink space and which mess was whose. But the alone part is very nearly lonely. Fifteen years is a lot of time to get used to someone, so when they’re suddenly gone, it is a weird adjustment. I’ve started measuring time in terms of the next time I’ll see my brothers, but I know seeing them this Thanksgiving will be just like they never left.
On the plus side, my cats are forced to hang out with me more, with no other option for attention besides my parents. Mandy and Steve are opposites, with Mandy being a big fan of lying right on top of your face and Steve liking to sit next to you. Now, I have at least one of them around me nearly all the time. Victory might taste like cat hair, but victory is victory.
I can eat all the Chex Mix and no longer have to hope that there’s a bit left for me when I get home from school. I love the freedom of being to pour a huge bowl without worrying that someone else wanted some, too. Unfortunately, now I can’t pin the disappearing birthday cake on a sibling. There are usually two suspects in the baked goods being eaten quickly, and one of them is in St. Louis for nine months of the year. But I do get all the corner brownies.
I think the hardest part is obviously how much I miss my brothers. Whenever we call, the conversation easily stretches past an hour, without even noticing. Especially right after they left, I would walk into one of their rooms expecting to annoy them. The number of times I have complained to my friends about a lack of brothers is staggering, especially considering how many times I have complained about a seeming overabundance of them.
These past few months have been different. I have spent a lot of time with my parents, which isn’t bad, but it is a new experience. Family movie nights skew more towards my mom and my taste because we finally outvote my dad. While I love being an only child, I love being a little sister more and no matter how fun these next couple of years will be, it will never be the same.
